10 Reasons to Bailout Bloggers Instead

Everyone is out hat in hand looking for a bailout, so let me throw in my two cents. Bail out bloggers. Pick the million most serious bloggers in the US and give loan them $500,000 each. This would be the last big bailout the economy needed. It would fix everything.

  1. It’s cheaper than TARP, the standard by which all such boondoggles will be judged in the future, and no worse for the economy.
  2. Instead of a million bloggers complaining about how the bailouts favored the rich or the well connected or the corrupt, you’d have a million bloggers singing the praises of the bailout.
  3. Instead of a million bloggers saying the economy was doomed and the bailouts only make it worse, you’d have a million happy bloggers blogging about all the new things they were buying.
  4. Votes. The pen is mightier than the sword or the fractional reserve. 😉
  5. Everyone knows Franklin Roosevelt saved the American economy with the introduction of Social Security by getting old folks out of the job market. This plan would attack the other end, getting thousands of young folks out of their day jobs and back in their jammies. Speaking of which…
  6. A boom for American industry. Billions of dollars in pajama sales are just the start. Mountain Dew and coffee sales would skyrocket. Pizza sales, through the roof. MP3 players, Amazon Kindles, Netbooks, wireless routers…
  7. Supplier jobs. A flood of money into blogging will create at least 40 or 50 new jobs at Godaddy and half a dozen smaller hosting companies. These companies have suffered in the wilderness with no bailout since 2000, the last time the Federal Reserve set out to wreck an industry. Think: Every basement in American with its own T1 line. No need to worry about a future bailout of AT&T. Speaking of basements…
  8. It would save the housing industry. 999,999 bloggers moving out of their parents’ basements and buying houses and 1 blogger paying his house off.
  9. Good for the auto industry. I know the first thing I’d do with my money is buy a new car. Probably an American made car. Probably a Ford. Probably a few hundred Tesla Roadsters would be purchased, too, and thoroughly reviewed online.
  10. It will be good for Google. More content, more pages to index, more Adsense publishers. Google has a market capitalization of $81 billion; GM has a market cap of $2.19 billion. It’s about time somebody said it:

    What’s good for Google is good for America.

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